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  • Life as a Perfectionist

  • In the last few years of my life, when I somehow got the chance of getting to know myself and realizing what excites me and drives me forward, I have to come to the realization that life as a whole is just suffering and whatever we do in between here and there, is just an illusion to forget about all the nonsense of the life as a whole.

    You may think that people scrolling Instagram might waste their life; (spoiler alert, they do!) But the main thing they are trying to do is to forget about how absurd this life is. They are just not interested in getting deep and feeling the emptiness of life as a whole. They are just fooling around to be distracted by this awful fact that whatever you do, it wouldn't matter in the end because you're gonna die alone and naked. Even if you do one or all of the following with your best effort:

    1. Getting the best girls out there to sleep with you,
    2. Becoming the richest person in the entire history of mankind using your skills and boldness in entrepreneurship,
    3. Doing good to make the world a better place like people before us such as Gandhi and all the other cool people,
    4. Getting married to some nice person and having children of your own,
    5. Make your parents' life easier by providing the financial material for them,
    6. Setting up a charity to feed and help the endless poor and poverty of the world,
    7. etc.

    In the end, it wouldn't even matter. You're just gonna die and it's a fact that in the world we live in, no one cares about you. That's a hard and bitter truth. That makes people sick. To the point where they will try their entire life satisfying other people and making their own selves feel good about the ugly truth of dying into emptiness after all the hassles to make an impact in the world, good or bad.

    They just want to forget, for a tiny fraction of a time, that they too, will die. They will vanish into thin air and nothing matters now or ever. They are just forgetting and distracting themselves from the bitter truth.

    This distraction, of course, doesn't come cheap; I've realized that nothing good comes without a price. These people are depriving themselves of self-actualization. Chatting all day with their buddies, telling jokes, and talking about all the shit that doesn't even matter. I have had the privilege of seeing many of these idiots around me and especially living with one in my brief history of livingness. They are just stupid and shallow and they never realize how stupid they look. And even when someone like me teases with their mind and the way they are wasting their lives, they won't stop being and acting like a complete idiot.

    They are just a 3 year old in a body of 30. I just want to be completely straight about something; I hate stupid people. I hate people who are ignorant enough to have screen time in their iPhone showing 4-5 hours of WhatsApp, Telegram, etc. talking with all the people even more stupid than themselves.

    These people are just a waste of oxygen in my idea. And I know for a fact that they are not few. They are just out there and it bothers me that they are just a waste of all the resources. If I could ever be a racist, I'd be differentiating these assholes from the rest of the world.

    They don't get bothered by not being the best versions of themselves. They don't hesitate to think that their stupid daily life is such a profound effect on every other member of their stupid life. They are just mortal, and that is the same reason they are trying to focus on the easy fantasy than the bitter reality.

    You will never see these kinds of people moving their asses or trying very hard and bearing the suffering to become a better person. They are just wasteful and they think that they have done enough good and productive good deeds in their day that they "deserve" to take a break and chat about all the nonsense and stupid jokes with their buddies over their stupid iPhone.

    You'll never see these kinds of idiots spending 2 hours a day in the library because that will make them face the bitter truth about mortality and absurdness of life. They will be bothered by this truth and they just want to distract themselves. No matter how they do it, they will always find a way;

    • Chatting with their buddies on Telegram, WhatsApp, etc.
    • Scrolling Twitter and feeling good about the valuable people they follow and how this is not a waste of life.
    • Check their Instagram every half an hour to see who has uploaded a new story.
    • Tapping on their iPhone to see yet another set of new notifications that they can spend their miserable lives with.

    And living with these clowns is just not easy. You have to bear the stupid arguments they bring up every now and then, even when you have put your noise cancellation headphones on and although they see that you are trying to focus, they will interrupt your flow with these kinds of stupid comments:

    • "You see how people have ruined the beautiful piles of snow in the street?"
    • "Why have I slept for so long? Who is responsible?"
    • "I have not taken my laptop to my bed but yet still I slept for so many hours."
    • "What do I want to do next? Go to the bathroom?"

    You know, you can despise me for talking all this hate speech shit, but I have tried to waken these idiots, to remind them that they need to do something impactful with their wasteful & miserable life, that they ought to do and be working harder if they mean to become some worthy shit.

    If you don't come from a rich family, you're gonna have to work your way up the hard way. You're gonna have to put more effort than an average person to be in that top 1%. You're gonna work your ass off to get what 99% of the people are afraid to have, even if they show appreciation of the good feeling of having/achieving them.

    They just hate to hear it. They would rather spend meaningless hours of their lives exchanging stupid jocks with their stupid friends laughing about something that isn't even funny.

    These people despise me, to be honest. It's not that they don't do good in life and that not having them is the better approach, but the knowledge that they would spend at least 70 percent of their lives on waste and not trying to become the expert in fields that may benefit society, and themselves above all, makes me sick.